Good Morning Girls!  I've got to be honest with you (as always), I am not feeling very inspired today.  Starting Friday morning, I have had a weekend of one bad news thing after another.  Some of it regarding me and my family, some of it regarding others close to me.  Some of it regarding people I don't know very well, but know enough to be moved and shaken a bit.
 The whole weekend I found myself struggling to keep my head up and thinking clearly.  I had moments where I felt the joy and peace of the Lord, followed by moments of anger and feeling like "what's the point?".  It's one thing to have a blah day here and there, but I am talking about being in the pit.......for three days now.  When I do feel angry I'm not even sure who to be angry with.  When I do feel hope I wonder if it is enough.
Now normally I wouldn't share all of this with you in this format.  It sounds so desperate, so negative, so......not ME!  However, I knew I could not sit down and write as if my heart was not heavy this morning.  I thought about not writing at all.  Instead I would wait until I "felt better" so I could write my normal words of encouragement.  But instead I decided to write you all at the same time as always, because I felt like if I didn't, the devil would be taking one more piece of my life. 
I know the devil doesn't really want my "things".  He could care less about all of it.  What he wants is my joy.....my peace.....my faith.  He wants me to be so shaken that I return to him and say "you were right, this faith stuff is a joke".  He wants me to return to my old way of life where I ministered to no one.  He wants my influence to be used for his work, not the Lords.  He wants me to feel sorry for myself so I comfort myself with some of my old vices....a cigarette, a glass of wine, and how about a trip to the casino?
Yeah, he thinks he's pretty close to pushing me over the edge.  Once he saw me planning my pity party, I felt his evil presence saying "It's only a matter of time".  And to be honest with you....there were moments here and there where I was afraid it was too. 
In fact, it wasn't until now.....now, as in THIS SECOND that I feel fully restored!  I think I had to acknowledge my feelings in order to press through them.  Now that they are out there, they somehow don't seem so threatening to me, and more importantly, my faith.
 Last week while I was studying, the Lord showed me a verse.  I loved it and wanted to use it for my writing right away.  I knew exactly what I was going to write about.  However, every time I tried I felt the Holy Spirit say "Not now.  Not today".  Every night I would meditate on it thinking "Lord, this is so good.....I know it would speak to so many....."  But always the same response "Not now. Not today."  Well, as I was writing to you just now, the Holy Spirit said "Now. Today."  I looked at the verse again, and my heart is no longer heavy.  All last week I thought this verse was going to be used in another way.  But no.  He was saving it for me....today.....and it has brought me out of the pit.
If any of you are in the pit, take hold of todays verse.  Plant it firmly in your heart, and crawl out of the darkness.  Me and the other Girls are waiting for you....ready to offer our hand or a hug.........
Thank you for what you all did for me today, without even having to do a thing, other than be there!


John 6:29 Jesus told them "This is the only work God wants from you :Believe in the one he has sent"

You can busy your mind with fear and "what if's", or you can busy your mind with belief in the Lord........I know which one I'm choosing!

Love you all-
Jen